Revenge of the Knitter

So I told y'all how much I hated that Wildfoote sock yarn, right?

Oh, did I find the perfect solution for getting back at it.

So, the recipe for revenge involves going to a thrift store and buying some poor, lonely, abandoned little Beanie Babies...



See them there?  Aww, aren't they cute?  Actually, no.  I think that Gorilla thing is hideous, and he had it coming.  And that angel bear?  Reminds me of a pretentious pop-princess wannabe.  I never liked stuffed bears.  I felt bad for the Walrus guy, though.  He actually was cute.

Anyways, knowing my destructive disposition these guys were doomed from the start and they were summarily sliced open and pirated for thier beans.



Poor little guys!

Anyways, whatever would I do with all those beans and all that Wildfoote? I was left with 3/4 of a skein left. I couldn’t let it go to waste. I had to find an appropriate pattern for a yarn this vile.

I had a short conversation with myself that went something like this:

Angel side: “Give the yarn a break. Maybe it’s not so bad. Try some wristlets with different pattern. It’ll be okay.”

Devil side: “Screw that” (demonic snickering) “Make a beanis”



I’m sure that this is the perfect project to show off my many years of crochet. >:D

The really funny thing? Wildfoote makes a beautiful Beanis.

Blogging

So there are some days when the blog posts just roll off the keyboard, and some days (months) where they just stare at you and flick you off.

This has been one of those months.

So now I am seriously behind in this thing I call a blog.  *ahem*  time to rectify that.

Socks.

I hate socks.  I really do.  

You go round and round and round and round, until you get to the heel.

Yay!  I actually like the heel because you're actually *doing* something and then you go round and round and round again until you hit the toe and you're done.  Of course you could do an awesomely intricate pattern but then your Dad asks you for socks and if you knit him lace he'll disown you.

The worst thing?  Everybody wants socks for Christmas.

Dad's Socks.

Ooooh, aaahhh. Basic socks with a somewhat interesting rib. Well, it was interesting the first dozen times I knitted it. Still, they knit up fast and they're warm and he loves them. Yay.  I didn't get any newer pictures of them because his feet kinda stink and it fogged up the camera lens

(either that or I was too full of Christmas Turkey read: too lazy to take some.)

These are the Socks I Hate.  That's their name.

Oh yes, I called them "Desert Sands" socks on Ravelry because the yarn was called "desert grass"  I'm changing the name.  I hate these socks.  I knit them (am knitting them - shame!) for my Aunt for Christmas.  As it is December 29th and that picture is a mere three hours old, you can see that they have not been finished for Christmas.

Why?  

Because I hateses them.  And they hate me back.

Ok.  The pattern?  I like the pattern.  It's the River Rapids sock pattern from sockbug.  The pattern is clear, easy to follow and nicely written.

So why do I hate these socks?

The yarn.

The yarn is Brown Sheep's Wildfoote.

I usually like Brown Sheep, but I have to say I hate this yarn.

It's slippery. It's not elastic at all. It splits worse than a bleach blonde with a hairdryer obsession. And the worst thing?

The damn socks turn out lovely

If this yarn was craptacular all around I could easily dismiss it, but nooo... it mocks me! It comes in all these lovely colors to entice me, and worse, the finished product is really nice! Soft, smooth, strong, and it feels good on the foot, it's as if this yarn is sitting back and laughing at knitters, flipping us the bird and saying "You'll hate knitting with me, but everybody will want a pair of socks made out of me, and you'll just have to suffer!"

I really hate this yarn.

even more I hate the fact that you either have to be an expert knitter or completely anal retentive while using it or you lose stitches like mad.  I swear either I have ten thumbs or it's the yarn, but every time I set my project down the stitches slip off the needles.  Even if it's just sitting there while I have to pee, I come back and have to pick up stitches.  This is where the splitting part comes in - you can't pick it back up, either!

Maybe I should learn to use point protectors every time I stand up for a Diet Coke, but I'm not that kind of knitter.  I have never had this problem before - and I don't even use DPNs.  I magic loop my socks!

And why am I convinced the socks hate me back?  because even after I packed meticulously every knitted present, the finished sock feel out of my bag and stayed in Vermont while I Christmassed in Wisconsin.

It's evil.  I swear it is.

My Grand Plan.

I have decided the best way to get back at the Wildfoote I hate so much...

I will have about 3/4 of a skein left after both socks are done.

I think I am going to crochet that leftover yarn into a Beanis

Since it is greenish yarn, it will be titled my "Gangreeous Benis"

Hah!